70

today was a waste - in every sense of the word.
for the first time in a long time i had a little bit of spending money, about $150, and it's almost all gone now. hopefully i get some more for my birthday.

i had my center lip re-pierced. i don't even care anymore, about being trendy or not looking like a faggot or seeming like a faggot. i'm just giving up, honestly. i'm going to do whatever i please without worrying about what somebody's first impression of me is. it's not like anything really matters at this age, anyway. you can't even really be held accountable for doing stupid things because you're young and need to learn the hard way or whatever. this sounds so cliche, you know, the whole iTs My LiFe, iTs mY StYLe, LikE iT or LeAve iT hehE god i hate myself sometimes. if i was somebody else and i encountered myself i would hate me so much. or maybe that's the incredibly judgmental side of me talking?